Forty and Loving It!

I will not hide my age! I will shout it from the mountain tops! I will proclaim it to all who listen! I am forty years old, and I am proud of it! I will no longer preface things I say with words like "I must be getting old..." or "many moons ago..." I will wear my age proudly! I will claim the truth...yes, I am forty! I LOVE being forty! Forty is fantastic!

Through the Years

Not quite "youth recaptured," but getting closer. At least these two pictures look like the same person. So that's me, then and now. I feel just as young now as I did then, but now I have more confidence. The young me had decades of happiness ahead of her--days full of love, days full of mothering, days full of fun. The more mature me expects to have decades of exciting adventures ahead! I'm just getting started!

My Before and After Picture

Wow! I still am working on losing the last few pounds, but I can REALLY see a big difference! I am so glad to be starting a new decade in good health! I feel SO much better!

My 40th Birthday!

Today is the day! Happy Birthday to me! I feel great! So here is what I look like today, the day I turn 40 and join the group of women in their forties. It's a great group to join! I can think of MANY women in this age group that I admire and would like to emulate. I can also think of many women in their fifties and sixties that are wonderful role models for us "forty somethings." Nothing but a good attitude here...not "Lordy, Lordy, look who's forty!"...more like, "I'm finally forty! Yippee!"

My plans for today? Spend the day on myself, of course! Get primped and pampered, go shopping, maybe get a professional portrait made to commemorate my special day. Even though my life still revolves around things like school schedules and other people's plans, I will have several hours today to focus on ME. I will write in my journal, I will meditate on my future plans, and I will welcome a new decade with happiness and anticipation. I'm not just "turning 40," I am entering one of the most exciting decades of my life! I can hardly contain my excitement! It's going to be a wonderful decade! My "fabulous forties"! Hooray!

Almost There!

Less than a week until my 40th birthday, and I am flying high! Weight loss: 33 pounds down, 7 to go...almost there. I went shopping and was amazed at some of the sizes I could wear...but I do know all about the changes in sizes, called "vanity sizes," that make us FEEL smaller than we really are! It still felt good putting them on and even having a little extra room! I KNOW the tiniest girls in America would wear a bigger size twenty years ago! This "vanity size" thing is really funny. At my tiniest in the 80s, I was under a 100 pounds and wore 3s/5s and sometimes 7s. Now I keep seeing people say they wear a 0 or 2...and they are bigger than I was back then! Guess I would have been a double zero!! That's just crazy!!

No matter what size I reach, I am feeling better about myself...I believe the saying about looking better = feeling better. It reminds me of times when I was sick and miserable, but felt SO much better after a long bath plus some pampering and primping. Not that appearance is everything...I definitely want to be valued more for WHO I am not HOW I look...but it still has a way of making me feel more confident about myself when I look my best. I guess that doesn't sound very feminist. There is a new wave of feminism now, called "third wave." The idea is to advocate empowerment for women while still embracing our unique feminine qualities. Maybe that explains my seemingly conflicting views. I want to be a strong and powerful woman, but I want to age gracefully and look and feel as good as possible for as long as possible. And I want to do this for ME, not for anyone else. The only person I am trying to please is myself!

In keeping with that theme, I am constantly fighting with my hair to keep the gray away. I have been cursed with the "premature gray" of most of the women in my family. The first strands begin appearing around 30 and they really try to take over around 40. In regards to the women in my family, most are completely "salt and pepper" by 45 and then "snow white" by 50. As far as I know, they all wear their white hair proudly. I think a lot of them get that "bluing" put in to keep it white instead of dingy and yellowed. Many have commented on being proud of their white hair. I think I may be the first woman in the family to NOT feel that way! I see those darn white hairs on my head as "the enemy"! I have battled with them for several years using do-it-yourself hair coloring systems. I feel SO much better when I look in the mirror and don't see them. If I let them go too long, my face becomes framed with them...I just HATE that! But I have struggled to find the perfect coloring for my hair. Some are too dark and make me look like Morticia Adams. When I try to go a bit lighter, it ends up being too "orangy." So I finally decided to get it professionally done. I have done this once or twice before, but I really can't afford to do it on a regular basis. I really enjoyed the pampering, but I nearly fainted when it was time to pay! In addition to the coloring, I had it cut into layers. The stylist did an excellent job! I really LOVE my hair right now! The problem is, how long will it last? I just cannot afford to return every few weeks to get touch-ups. Maybe I can find something to do at home in between salon appointments. But I am determined to keep this up...no white hair for me!

Well, I am almost 40 and I have nearly accomplished many of the goals that I set for myself. I had intended to reach many of them before my 40th birthday. I have some goals that I will not complete until AFTER my birthday. I hope to continue my weight loss and hopefully will be in the best shape possible by the end of the year. If so, then my New Year's Resolution will be to MAINTAIN the weight loss and STAY in good shape! After years of resolving to "lose weight" every January, it will be nice to change that to "maintain" instead of "lose"! It will feel great to accomplish that goal! That was one that kept showing up every year, and it felt like the "impossible dream" for a while. Now I am beginning to believe that the "impossible" is truly POSSIBLE! This applies to many areas of my life!

I will receive my Master's Degree in May...a few months beyond my birthday, but I still will be forty when I accomplish this goal. I am truly proud of myself for going back to school and preparing myself for a major career change. I know I will be starting fresh...a beginnner...a rookie...a newbie. In some ways, I feel like such a teenager again! You know the feeling...fresh from graduation, feeling like you can conquer the world and do anything you want to do! It is such an exciting time! I have big dreams and I believe I can accomplish my goals. Late start? Maybe. Too late? NO WAY! Some of the most accomplished people in life didn't really get going until they hit "midlife." This idea that the world belongs to young people and once you reach a certain age it is "too late"...well, that very idea is extremely outdated! Baby Boomers changed the world and continue to do so as they reach middle age. The time of catering to young people is over...they have matured into midlfe and now it is time to cater to the largest demographic in American history. I believe I can join this group of midlifers and be part of the "midlife revolution." This phenomenon is really happening...Boomers are changing what it means to be "over 40." I think it is so fascinating! I want to be part of the excitement!

I will be back next week to comment on how I feel when I am "officially in my forties." I am truly inspired by women reaching 40, 50, or 60 who say that they feel better now than they ever have before. I am beginning to see exactly what they mean. I feel so rejuvenated! As good as a teenager, but better because I have more knowledge and confidence than I did in my teens. The general idea that life is full of possibilities and the best part of life is still ahead of us...now THAT is a good attitude! Remember that song with the line, "My future's so bright, I gotta wear shades." That's EXACTLY how I am feeling right now! Woo hoo! :)

Countdown to My 40th Birthday!

OK, don't think I am crazy, but I am truly excited about turning forty! I mean, there are some things about my youth that I wish I could recapture (mainly my youthful looks and figure!), but I am beginning to embrace the exciting changes that being "over 40" can bring. And I like the idea of being able to say that I'm in my "early forties" as opposed to my "late thirties." It just has a better ring to it! :) I also feel as if I am about to join a fabulous club of women that I wasn't quite an official member of in my "thirties." Maybe it's because I live and breathe by magazines and books that refer to "women over 40" and how fabulous this stage in life can be! Whatever the reason, I am embracing the idea wholeheartedly and I am ready to begin my forties with a good attitude! My thirties were my "frumpy years" and I kind of "let myself go." As I neared the end of that decade, I began to awaken and pay more attention to myself. Now I am ready to enter the next decade with a whole new attiitude and a brand new me! Bring it on!

The only thing I am slightly disappointed about is that I probably won't quite make my goal weight by my birthday. I will be close, but not quite there. My goal was to lose 40 pounds by my 40th birthday. I am currently down around 30 pounds with about 10 to go. I am very proud of myself that I have changed my lifestyle to a healthier one and that I have lost quite a bit, but that last chunk is really being stubborn! And the way I am carrying that last bit of weight--still in my belly...still makes me look and feel slightly pregnant...still an eyesore to me! I HATE that flabby belly! I am ready to "give birth" to my 10 pound "bundle of blob"! When I lose the last 10 pounds, I better see a difference or I may seriously be considering a tummy tuck! Even though my goal weight is based on the ideal weight for a woman my size, I still was much smaller than that in my younger days. I wonder if an additional 10 to 15 pounds would make a big difference? I plan to keep living my new and healthy lifestyle--eating small healthy meals, drinking a LOT of water, and walking at least 5 miles a day. Maybe the pounds will keep shedding...I sure hope so. No matter what, I do feel much healthier and I truly feel much more energetic now. Losing weight is an added benefit, but overall good health is my ultimate goal.

So the countdown begins...12 days until I officially enter the club of women in their forties. I plan to go shopping for a stylish and youthful fall wardrobe, get my hair colored and cut into a fabulous style (so NOT like the middle-aged style of my mother's generation!), and transform myself into the woman that I want to be for this new decade. My birthday will symbolize my metamorphosis...I plan to exit the cocoon of my thirties and fly bravely and proudly into my forties. I am SO excited! :)